Your steadfast love endures forever.

Give thanks to the God of heaven,

for his steadfast love endures forever.

Psalm 136:26

Give thanks to the Lord

He is good

Your steadfast love endures forever

You are the God of gods

and the Lord of lords

Your steadfast love endures forever

Lord, You do great wonders

all around me

Your steadfast love endures forever

You threw Pharaoh and his armies

into the Red Sea

Your steadfast love endures forever

You know how to handle

fears, tears, that threaten

Your steadfast love endures forever

You control all storms and earth-shakes

from Your highest heavens

Your steadfast love endures forever

Sun and moon always

shining on all of us

Your steadfast love endures forever

Light of Your gospel

revealed always in Jesus

Your steadfast love endures forever

Never alone in my joys or

in my sorrows

Your steadfast love endures forever

You love me now

You love me tomorrow

Your steadfast love endures forever

Give thanks to You, Lord

for You are always good

Your steadfast love endures forever

Hope: the half-remembered song

Surely there is a future,

and your hope will not be cut off.

Proverbs 23:18

God wants His people to live in hope, to thrive with a vision of His glory as their future. It is a difficult world we live in. This is why we need a divinely appointed vision of the future driving us forward. Surely there is a future! Here is why we need to look to God for a living future and hope:

• Our perspective is limited. Many times I cannot lift my eyes beyond the immediate circumstance in which I find myself. Because this world is cursed by sin, and because my own heart is also so sinfully bent, it can be very difficult to see beyond all that sin warp. And there is difficulty in life (God told Adam that hard work, sweat, and pain would attend all daily labor) and there is pain even to gain something wonderful (God told Eve she would experience great pain in bringing forth children), it is easy to lose hope in all the hardship. I NEED God’s future revealed to me in order to move me from my near-sighted perspective and grasp tenaciously a powerful, wonderful hope.
• We were created for so much more! I was recently reminded of this longing within us articulated by C.S. Lewis so well in The Weight of Glory: “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” Lewis went on to describe a sort of half-remembered song we were born with that pulls our souls toward a better world as we feel hints of it in inexplicable moments of transcendence: “…only the scent of a flower we have not found, the echo of a tune we have not heard, news from a country we have never visited.” And those existential pulses beat in our hearts! They are why we need a God-directed hope and future. We were created for so much more than our own experiences here and now. When we think about it, our souls KNOW this! That longing drives much human frustration and also much great human art. But it is only truly fulfilled in the gospel’s hope of a New Heavens and a New Earth.

O great God of mystery for Whom I long!

Be my hope! A vision of glory drives me to seek You alone, to hold out through life’s hard work, pain, griefs, sorrows, faint joys and Your provision of my daily bread to find true hope. No earthly adventure, no mountain vista, no ocean swell, no rapturous romance, no laughter with a true love will ever come close to the powerful presence You will give me in eternity in a universe that will be the home of righteousness when You remake it. I tenaciously hold on to hope as I listen attentively to the whispers of that half-remembered love song that first drew me to You. I want echoes of that love song leading me into the experience of life to transport even my daily interactions to that realm! Carry me forward with that scent, with that tune, believing that news from Your far off country. Carry me home!

Amen

thorns & snares

Thorns and snares are in the way of the crooked;

whoever guards his soul will keep far from them.

Proverbs 22:5

The warning in this proverb is to guard one’s soul from the thorns and snares of this life. This requires vigilance. It requires both faith and an active plan. A thorn is a weed that grows up to choke off the life of a good plant. A snare is a deliberate trap to capture and end a life. Both of them can be stumbled into and cause a lot of damage, if not death. Both can overwhelm us and destroy us. As I think through this calling in this proverb to be careful, I think I see some possible thorns and snares to attentively avoid. Here are my current big three:

• Entertainment. The world offers so many appealing options, nearly all of them are devoid of God-honoring values. And lately I’ve found virtually every TV show, streaming series, movie, or post-modern song pushes a worldview and a moral imperative that is rife with sinful snares. Captivating my mind with such poison is not good. I’ve had to seriously reign in my consumption of entertainment and institute active accountability with people I trust to keep me from ensnarement.
• Laziness. I am deeply tempted to just do nothing… and this is a very new thorn in my heart… a struggle I’ve never had before. I know that it stems from way too much time alone, letting unfocused grief give way to self-pity, covetousness of the past and of others, and it leads me right into the swamp of despond. But I usually open the door to that journey myself. That’s wrong. And so I guard myself from watering this thorn of laziness by cultivating much more ministry around people face-to-face, doing a whole lot more outdoor physical exercise so that I am truly tired at the end of day, not just lazy, and trying to add new friendships to old friendships to challenge myself relationally, emotionally, and spiritually.
• Singleness. I have a new appreciation for the challenges that adult singles face daily. And as our culture pushes against biblical purity of heart, the pressure of that snare is felt by me in ways I had forgotten could be so VERY strong. Being an old dude doesn’t make the battle easier. I know what I am missing and so it kind of feels more difficult. It’s so different than when I was last single as a young man forty years ago. You’d think I’d be much more wise, seasoned by life, inoculated by a faithful, fruitful, expressive marriage, ready to settle into contented acceptance of a singleness given at the end of that great experience. But in many ways the alone part of being single can feel like a snare, which I must continue to build accountability around. To me it looks like the most dangerous of the three, needing real discernment, direct action, and continuous examination of my motives and emotions. 

Handling these three starts at the heart and these three active principles from Proverbs help me to step back from my feelings, lean into scriptural facts, and trust by faith what God is doing to keep me from thorns and snares:

• GUIDE MY HEART: Proverbs 23:19 - Hear, my son, and be wise, and direct your heart in the way.
• GUARD MY HEART: Proverbs 4:23 - Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.
• DON’T FOLLOW MY HEART: Proverbs 28:26 - Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.

So I pray several times daily a prayer something like this: Lord, protect me. Surround me with wisdom, your Spirit’s guidance,  and honest friends to push me away from the dangerous thorns and snares.

Amen

Crushed

A man's spirit will endure sickness,

but a crushed spirit who can bear?

Proverbs 18:14

As I reflect on this profoundly simple proverb, I take into account its undeniable observation. In life, we can endure much sickness of the body. But when the soul is crushed under the weight of loss, abuse, or relentless trauma or stress, a person may find life too hard to bear. I’ve seen this as a pastor and counselor for decades of personal ministry to the hurting. And in God’s providence, I’m in a season of personally experiencing a degree of it right now.

I experienced the first part of this proverb as 2023 began in January and February as God called me to minister in terminal illness. Looking back on that experience, it was actually a kind of precious gift. It gave me 24/7 access to the one my soul loves most on this earth. For at least the first four weeks of that season we spoke deeper, shared much loving conversation, settled our souls that it was ending, and I cared for her with much less of my own selfishness that I had ever cared our entire 36 year marriage. We expressed joys, thanksgivings, and both of us really agreed that even in past hard times we had no regrets. She even shared her thoughts and wishes for my future without her and encouraged me even as she was herself dying. This was beautiful. This was a kind of happy, sad ending. The sickness was endurable as God’s grace led us intimately together.

But when death came, the crushing for me began. It wasn’t the crushing of an unknown eternity. I handed her over to her True Bridegroom and felt like He had taught me to love her as He loves His Church. Her suffering ended. That part was and is still glorious to me. The crushing though is felt most in the immensity of her absence. Four decades of a lovely and loving presence that was ALWAYS there for me was ripped away and is gone for the days I have left on this earth. And as much as I lean into the promise that God’s Spirit dwells in me, God’s Word comforts me, that Jesus will never leave me nor forsake me, and that God the Father always sees me graciously through the righteousness of His Son, I still feel the loss. It does not crush me into complete impotence. But it does bear down on me forcing me to realize life’s tasks are more difficult than they used to be. It takes all the eternal perspective I can find to blunt the edge of grief’s piercing blows. But the blows are still heavy and the enemy wants to use them to crush me. And they would indeed crush me completely if not for God’s gracious work in me.

I am thankful that God provides perspective so my spirit is never completely crushed! And in the big picture, which I cling to with tears tenaciously, eternity will have no more tears (Revelation 21:4)! Indeed, in Christ, I will endure! I will go on now, with hope and a longing for a joy I was made for, remembering the song of the redeemed, until that final day, when my joy is completely restored.

seek counsel to be wise

By insolence comes nothing but strife,

but with those who take advice is wisdom.

Proverbs 13:10

Proud thoughts will keep me quiet

stumbling all

alone

What I need now is wisdom

illuminating words

shone

If I do not seek advice

disappointing mental

strife

But in good counsel

rejoicing spiritual

life

Proud, but with nothing

only personal

pain

Humbled, with wisdom’s direction

always tremendous

gain

Insolent prideful heart!

locked away

blue

Willing seeking heart!

liberated by

You

Wisdom is much better

than all

self-talk

Seeking counsel is essential

to all

my walk

ministering to the anxious

Anxiety in a man's heart weighs him down,

but a good word makes him glad.

Proverbs 12:25

Anxiety can come from many directions. It can come from multiple directions at once. Here are a few I’ve noticed over my lifetime:

• The Unknown. This is pure fear of being out of control from something unanticipated.
• The Future. Similar to the first one, but somehow more ominous and unsettling, especially when accompanied by a recent loss or a major change.
• Illness. A new diagnosis or a suspected health issue is unsettling at many levels. This is part of our mortality and increases with age. No matter how much we believe God for our eternity, it is still scary.
• Opinions of others. This is a people-pleasers worst nightmare. Some times just not knowing if people or a person in particular likes me can bring overwhelming apprehension and doom. It’s crazy, I know, but it is my anxiety talking when I feel it.
• Expectations from self or others. My own expectations of myself can be very unrealistic and create stress, as can pressure from things like job, relationships, or economic need.
• Guilt. Sometimes my heart is anxious because I know I have been sinning to get what I want, I keep sinning against this knowledge, and anxiety ramps up over the conviction of sin as I run from repentance. This is the worst anxiety.

The remedy to such times in this proverb: “a good word”. Communication is a key to anxiety relief, particularly communication that is “good” —- ultimately from scripture. Encouraging talk from people who truly care helps. My experience is that it is not easy to get this, particularly if you have lost your main encourager. Sometimes I feel like I have to constantly “fish for it” and actively draw out kindness from others. That does not help anxiousness. It feels like it is up to me then to make people into encouragers. 

This experience has changed how I want to help people. One tip I am learning is to ask hurting people very regularly NOT “How are you doing?” (I will get a pat answer to move me along), but instead I try to have a conversation and then drill into the details of that conversation about where they are in life right now to ask “Can I help you (specific need inserted that I found out in conversation) right now?” Anxiety needs that level of attention, not a litany of critical examination. I know that this is what my heart needs in this season of grief accompanied with anxiety. It hurts to reach out to others and then have to begin the conversation and then admit I am scared. I frankly am not going to do it because if I have to take the lead, I doubt the person really cares. 

But when someone shows up, dives in deeper, and offers tangible time and help… I WILL let them into this mess to help clean me up! THAT is a “good word”. It is spoken with true care to real need, entering into and helping change an anxious situation.

deeds of my flesh/fruit of the Spirit

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23

I do not want my life robbed of the fruit of the Spirit. Yet my demands, my emotions, my selfish nature can do so if I let it. And I have. When I read the list of the works of the flesh (Galatians 5:19-21), I can get falsely proud of the fact I haven’t been controlled by them. Well, that is, until I dig a little deeper into my broken, wicked heart.

This culture has made me way too tolerant of immoral thinking in my mind. I, like all men I know, have to fight this constantly with the culture ramping up the pressure to be a sensual thinker. It really is not any easier even in my sixth decade. And yes, I never have had an overt idol in my home, but I have indeed worshipped many a false god in my own way. I can report that I have absolutely no idea what a drunken orgy looks like in my life… but strife, jealously, anger, division, envy… those are way too familiar and all of them have taken me dark places relationally and personally in my past. Yep… the works of the flesh HAVE clearly evidenced themselves in me. And jealousy, anger, and envy rise up easily, sometimes daily, in my life right now as I have a tendency to compare my life these days to what once was just a few short months back, or to what I think others have that I should have. So I really do desperately need to keep a tight rope around my sinful heart, reign in this fleshly thinking, and live in such a way that the Spirit can exhibit fruit growing from my heart outward to my life.

So Lord,

I confess my current need to repent of fleshly deeds. The desires of my flesh are against the Spirit, just as Your Word says. Forgive my impurity, my living for my senses, my jealousy, my anger at my current situation, my irrational envy of others, my idolizing of a life I think was or is better than the one You are giving graciously to me right now. All things, even in loss and trial, are Your gifts for my good and Your glory! I tell others this all the time. Why is it so incredibly hard for me to accept it? It is simply fleshly unbelief. I repent.

May I know instead Your Spirit’s renewal of me. Right now I ask You to lead me to know Your love, joy, peace, patience, and self-control. Help me to steward well my thoughts, to release my feelings that dominate my thinking, and instead, to believe Your Word and follow where Your Spirit will lead me. From the longsuffering fruit of affliction, may the sweeter, greater fruit of Your Spirit be known.

Amen