I am speaking the truth in Christ—I am not lying; my conscience bears me witness in the Holy Spirit— that I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart. For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers, my kinsmen according to the flesh.
Romans 9:1-3
Paul carried with him a certain sorrowful burden borne for the Jews who rejected Jesus. His desire was for Israel to repent and to joyfully find the Messiah in Jesus just as he had. He knew what it meant to be powerlessly unable to keep the law while zealously fending for it. God had mercifully saved him from legalism and rejection of the Messiah and brought him to a glorious love of Jesus through the gospel. This is what Paul wanted his kinsmen Jews to find.
Yet in all the joy in Christ, Paul had a sorrow in His heart for the lost sheep of the house of Israel. It did not let up and showed itself in his missionary efforts where he first went to the Jews, always preaching the gospel to them first in the synagogue when he traveled to a new city.
Looking at Paul, I take a quick survey of my own heart for the lost, and I have to say that “unceasing anguish” and “great sorrow” really don’t fill my heart like they did his. And there is no way I really want to be cursed to hell if it would save the lost I should care about. I am quite the selfish evangelist in comparison. I must see those outside of Christ with the love of Christ Who died for them. O God... give me a passion for the gospel that is broken for those who need it so!
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