church family

Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity.

1 Timothy 5:1-2

God’s design for the local church is inter-generational. Paul points out four distinct groups within the adult congregation of the church, instructing Timothy to recognize unique opportunities for ministry with each group. And the primary pastoral care admonition is familial. Church members should treat each other like family.

Older men. This is the first category of church member mentioned. And Timothy is instructed to treat older men like fathers. Even if the older guy needs to change, Timothy‘s approach, in fatherly respect, was to encourage that man with respect and not rebuke. He must recognize a stage of life that an older man is experiencing. As an older man myself, I see my role in church, especially as an elder and pastor, as focused on helping the next generations learn, grow, and lead. I feel an inherent respect from most people. It is humbling and a little scary. I pray they will do well when God takes me home.

Younger men. The role of this group is brotherhood. I’ve been through that stage and I want to see guys find that relationship. American men in particular are too isolated. We need comrades and brothers in arms because Satan snipes us when we try to go it solo!

Older women. They are the mothers of the church. I’ve been blessed by this group’s hospitality and instruction. Many have been the ways my family has been refreshed over the years and cared for by the older women of the church. Even today, I feel the prayers and care of this group in my local church the most.

Younger women. Like the men of their generation, younger women need one another. They are sisters. And relational connection is vital for young wives and moms. Churches thrive when these women are recognized, honored, and allowed to use their gifts to build each other up.

The church is a healthy place when it feels like family and operates under these family “rules”. I am blessed to live like this and to have known it the most in my life when I have really needed it, especially in this last year! Praise God for my church family who will always feel like home.