longing

 

How lovely is your dwelling place,

O Lord of hosts!

My soul longs, yes, faints

for the courts of the Lord;

my heart and flesh sing for joy

to the living God.

Psalm 84:1-2

When the holy work of Christ is at work in me, when I let the Spirit of God work in me using the Word of God to transform my inner person, I find my passions changing. I want to have a heart that longs to be with God. I yearn for His presence and power. I want my heart and my flesh not to be steeped in self-centered sinfulness. I want my heart and flesh to find joy and expression in God. I want to sing from the simple, pure, single-minded joy of knowing God.

I realize that as much as I have this desire, I am my own worst enemy when it comes to seeing it come to fruition. I want full devotion to God. I fight a stinking devotion to my self, my unrepented sin, and the muddy, worthless, earthly trinkets I tend to clench tightly in my heart as my dearest treasures. To truly know this longing for God, this desire to always be in God's presence, I must "put off" what is earthly in me (Colossians 3:5), considering it dead, so that I can "put on" this holy, joyful longing in a new worship-filled life.

O Lord,

Help me lead a funeral today for the wickedness in my heart. I say that I want You, and Your new creation in me does long for You, but I confess, there is so much in my "old man" that still forces my head down in an earthly stare. And like the prodigal I want to feed on pig slop. I repent of this. I fight against the weight of sin so that I may run, with all my longing, into the courts of the LORD, Your lovely dwelling place, there to live!

Amen